Well its march 2021 and I’ve reached a new peak with my weight. So, I’m trying again to document things and lose weight. I hit 369 the other day after a bad couple of weeks of eating. I’m going to give intermittent fasting a shot. I tried it before but I think I was too aggressive with the hours. This time I’m going to try to do 16 hours of fasting. At minimum I know I can do this easily 4-5 days a week because I usually eat late in the day at work anyways. What I’ve read is that even doing it a few days out of the week can be effective, which is more lenient than something like keto where you can’t mess up a day.
I’ve been doing this for a 3 days now and I stuck to it pretty well. All I really have to do is not eat after 8pm and don’t eat before 12pm. I veared off a little bit here and there by having a snack at like 10pm but nothing too bad and I’m down 6 pounds to 363. I feel like since I’m so overweight I should make it my goal to lose 1 pound per day until I’m down near 300 before the progress slows down. So I’m going to keep doing this for two months and hopefully I’m down to a weight I haven’t been in over 2 years.
update 4/17/2022: I don’t think I stayed with the fasting for more than a couple weeks. Lots of difficult things happened in life during this time and I lost focus. However, I did follow a detox/cleanse/diet my dad/doctor planned out and it helped me lose about 20 pounds. I had gotten up to 378 before starting it and got down to 358. It really helped me get rid of craving so much carbs and processed food. I basically hated the taste of fast food afterwards. I’m still at 358 a few months after, but I got down to 347 at one point. I’ve started eating poorly again the last couple weeks, mainly because of stress, so my weight went up about 10lbs. I’ll get back on track. Theres no reason why I can’t get down to 300 in the next 2-3 months. Just gotta focus.
update 6/6/2022: The hardest part about losing weight for me right now is that life happens and the stress and depression is overwhelming. I eat poorly mainly because I don’t want to plan what I’m going to eat or spend the energy cooking. Even if I get the energy to cook, I then don’t have the energy to clean up and the kitchen stays a mess for a week before I force myself to take care of it. I feel like a lazy slob, which I guess is the truth, but it’s not because I don’t want to get things done it’s because I physically and mentally feel beaten down. I feel like I’m spending all my energy just to get through the day, and on the weekends when I actually have time to do things I just spend it sleeping and recovering. Or, I spend it distracting myself so I don’t let a single thought enter my head that sends me down a rabbit hole of depression. That’s a big problem. I feel like such a failure right now. This trauma has defeated me and simple tasks of life feel like a battle. Getting up in the morning feels like the gravitational force of the earth has tripled and I physically have to exert an abnormal amount of energy to stand up and walk. Now that I think about it I feel like that scene from the movie Men of Honor where the diver who has a prosthetic leg has to walk 12 steps in an insanely heavy diving suit. That was my favorite movie growing up. I’m just now remembering it and how inspirational it is. I know it sounds like I’m feeling sorry for myself, but I’m not sorry- I’m frustrated. I don’t want to feel like this, I want to feel normal and be able to do normal things like clean, fix things around the house, and work out. Instead I’m just drained constantly. There’s just an imense weight on my back and it feels impossible to take those 12 steps.